It is not only about you.

In any relationship, be it friendship, parent-child, boy-girl... there will always be a balance in everything that happens. True, there will be times both of you are happily together, times when both of you go through hard times together. But most of the time, there will always be someone who gets hurt or suffers. This is particularly true when a relationship faces hard times. Both sides suffer, yet both will complain that they suffer more than the other does. How do we weigh it out who suffers more? There is no scale to measure just how much your suffering is more than the other. You thought that you gave too much than what you receive. On the other hand, the person might think that what you give is not enough.

This is where Einstein's theory of relativity come into picture. It is very interesting and kinda awesome that each of us has a different mind of its own. A different level of sensory perception. The feeling that i get from touching this keyboard is different from how you touch it. In general it is easy to say for example, this keyboard is too soft, too hard, etc. But my level of softness in your perception, might not be soft. The thought of this is exhilarating. Till now we have not been able to come up with something to measure our senses. In another words, our feelings. We always hear people say, i feel your pain. I know how you feel. This is quite untrue, possibly overused/generalized as a comfort word. Each person's unique perception of pain, i must not forget, happiness, too, is what makes us living being such an interesting species.

I am still learning. Getting to know all these wonderful discoveries and figuring out human's complex mind is something that intrigues me. I find myself opening up to discussions instead of arguing that i'm right you are wrong. I find myself more forgiving to other people's behavior that would have offend me. I try to think in his perspective, what is he thinking when he did that, why would he do it in that way. I start to develop a curious mind in other peoples' minds and their behavior. Although sometimes i still cannot control myself and get emotional easily, but i'm trying. It's just amazing how the human mind works. How your physical actions would affect your brain. How, by mentally distracting yourself you might find better solution to small matters that makes you go crazy.

Of course, sometimes it clashed with my own principles. I become too focused on one matter that i totally ignored the opportunities passing by. Even when i am writing this down now, my brain is telling me all sorts that "distract" me from my main topic. All the possible things i could have say but i did not. Being out of topic yet feeling this is more important, etc etc. Sometimes i really wish to be a human computer. All the thoughts in my mind flashing by, i couldn't capture it, by the time i digest one, another piece comes. I need more RAM. More processing power. More storage. I want to document all these thoughts, i want to be able to flip through my files and say, "Hey, this might be useful in the future." It is such pity a human brain capacity is so limited.

One of these days someone might come up to me and say, "Hey! Our feelings are not for you to toy about like a scientific experiment!" Well, i am starting to see the human body as a tool. A capsule for our "souls", so to say. Since we all are gonna die anyway, why not make good use of our bodies, our feelings, and our actions to make our lives more fulfilling? And studying them is just another way for me to fulfill my curiosity, a learning process which all of us will be going through till the day we exhale our last breath on earth. Who knows, there might be exams on how and why we live on earth before we could enter Heaven.

Assuming is not a sin, it is not a pain in the ass just because you assumed and made the wrong decision. It is by assuming we open up possibilities and from there, only do we have the responsibility to make a right decision.